Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Red Writing Hood Meme: Your Mother

This is for a writing meme on The Red Dress Club blog. Critiques are always welcome! (And this one is not saucy. Sorry, you'll have to wait on that one.)

.:*:.

"Your mother never ceases to amaze me," he said as they pulled out of her parents' driveway and onto the snow-covered streets of Toledo. Delia loved spending the holidays in in her childhood home, but lately the time there was becoming unbearable when it included Elliott. "Here I thought she would be an amazing cook, and yet the ham she made was so dry I had to soak that puppy in gravy just so it wouldn't taste like sawdust." He chuckled hoarsely. "And could the asparagus have been more overcooked and limp? My mom could cook circles around yours, babe..."

Delia let him prattle on, turning her attention to the cityscape outside the car. She had grown up in this neighborhood, a quiet little suburb where everyone seemed to know everyone else. Her folks weren't rich, but they had managed to secure a good-sized nest egg that allowed them to live comfortably in retirement. Her father Ed had been a fireman, ever since he had first volunteered with his local firehouse when he was eighteen. Her mother Eva had worked as the head librarian at the local public library. The two had met by chance when the IGA grocery store next to the library had caught fire. Call it an accident, call it Fate- they had been a couple since.

Delia glanced at Elliott, seeing his lips move but not hearing a sound he made. She had always believed she would find The One and have the fairy tale wedding most girls dream about. She had always imagined The One being a modern Prince Charming, clad in Armani suits for armor, a Jaguar sports car for a steed, and overflowing coffers that would make a member of the Royal Family jealous. Of course, she reasoned with herself, at this point I'd take Joe Anyman who has a Hyundai and a 401k instead of this bozo.

"Are you even listening to me?" Elliott's voice pulled her back to the present.

"I'm sorry," she replied. "I must have dozed off. I guess I'm more tired than I thought." Elliott scoffed.

"Don't see how. I mean, it's not like you've done anything all day." Great. THIS again.

"Y'know, just drop me off at my place. I have some papers to work on before the break is over, and I want to get started on them. I'll just come over tomorrow or something."

"Seriously?" He looked at her incredulously. "It's Thanksgiving, for Christ's sake. You aren't back at school for another three days. Can't it wait?" Delia shook her head and he sighed heavily, a dejected sound. He had apparently been hoping for a nightcap, but Delia had been hit with a revelation that required other plans, ones not including him. A year was way too long for this kind of emotional baggage, and it was time to kick the ship called Elliott out of the harbour.

.:*:.

5 comments:

  1. I LOVED THIS!!

    I loved it because of the rich dialogue. I loved it b/c it felt like a short story. I loved it because I never saw the ending coming.

    Fantastic!!

    Thank you!

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  2. I always love it when the character finally realizes her man is a moron - and then boots him out! Nice job!!!

    And thanks for participating!

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  3. Great job! I loved the characters and how you used the dialog to show Elliot's, well, character. I loved the ending too. :)

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  4. I hate him. I really do! I wanted to break up with him! LOL

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  5. hi from the red dress club!

    this reminds me of a relationship i had once. i used to rest my head against the passenger side window of his car and think "is there anyone else out there??" and there was. i married him. :) this hit home and you drew the characters fabulously!

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